Words Are All We Have

I am a consistent dreamer. By this, I mean that on most nights I do experience a handful of dreams. You would think this is a common thing. But some people claim they don't really dream much, or they simply can't recollect the dreams they do have. The result is still the same. They aren't really experiencing the joys or pains of dreams.

This post has nothing to do with dreams. But a dream was the trigger for these thoughts. We make friends and lose friends across our lifetime. Depending on your personality the degree to which this happens can vary. But the making of friends seems to happen far more commonly at our younger age.

The reason I started thinking about this whole thing is that I had a perfectly normal and positive interaction with a friend in one of my dreams. Nothing out of the ordinary about that. On waking up though reality hit me. I had not interacted with that friend for an inexplicably lengthy period.

I thought about this for a bit. Was there any reason that we hadn’t interacted? I concluded that there was no specific reason. Time, geographical distance, professional and personal changes slowly wedged us apart. This happens to everyone I would assume. Some connections grow stronger and weaker with time.

The tragic part is the best memories that we share with a person never fade away even though they are no longer a major part of your life. Thinking about incidents, conversations, shared jokes, endless discussions, and agreements over a movie, show or book. Opinions about a particular other culture or person. These little exchanges of thoughts, the baring of our souls, were moments of intense joy.

What I would give to have those kinds of conversations again. On the other hand, it’s also worth thinking if I was the only one deriving the pleasure from it. Seems unlikely but one can never be sure. Perhaps it’s best not to think about these things at all. This is probably how the game of life plays out for most people.

Maybe most natural friendships are transitory by default. To expect anything more is foolhardy. Or maybe I was the one who changed. Ultimately it was the words that were said that mattered. The thing that this teaches me is that you must revel in a conversation that gives you pleasure. But leave it at that. Expect nothing more.

If fate, has it in store, from the dying embers of a friendship the sparks of an unforgettable conversation may kindle the flames of your comradeship again.